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10月30日 A story about how I thought I was going to DIE at INDY...I had considered calling this 'Shit that can only happen to me' but i think i have used that before (eek... when did msn stop letting you swear?! this is going to be difficult...)
So anyway - Indy...
I didn't go to indy but I went to visit Nay and Rach at kingscliff on the weekend of indy, and when I left there, I knew that my brother and a few people we know were going to be there, so I went into surfers/the casino to meet up with them. I ended up driving my brother to meet up with some people at... I can't even remember what it's called now - that 'island' that is paralell to surfers... and on the way there, we saw dudes walking accross the road in nothing but red undies, (undie man! - wow that brings back some memories circa 2001 - long story) and my second favourite, was the dude that jumped in front of my car, on the Gold Coast Highway, and screamed 'STOP' - which, obviously, I did, considering if I hadn't I would have had drunk random plastered over my car. I prefer to hit people I know.
The stupidest part though happened AFTER dropping my brother off. He used my mobile to call Jenna because he didnt have any battery, and afterwards, didn't give me back my car. After randomly groping for it on my front seat and the floor, whilst driving, (luckily no randoms jumped in front of me this time), and being unable to find it, I assumed that chris had taken it and not given it back, and as a result I was driving all the way from Surfers to Brisbane, in the middle of the night, with no phone, by myself. It's just like the start of one of those horror movies where the stupid girl forgets to charge her battery, or whatever, then dies from stupidity when some axe murderer tries to help her, and ends up choping her into little bits. That stupid girl, she and I have a lot in common.
So me and all my genius decide that the best option would be to call someone he was with from a payphone, and organise meeting him on the side of the road somewhere. So, I pulled into a side street in one of those middle-of-the-road carparks, on the corner of a caryard where, at least there should be cameras or something, and left my headlights on so that if some random creepy dude tried to kill me, at least he had some light to help with the chopping, although my original logic was that someone would notice the headlights, and hopefully stop him mid-chop.
The dudes around didn't seem creepy though, just two dad-types and a young guy who didn't look very scary, who was barefoot - how many psycho random girl indy killers do you know who go around barefoot? (Hopefully everyone knows that's supposed to be rhetorical...)
So i walked to the payphone, and noshoesguy was standing in front of it. I asked him if he was using the phone, and he told me to go for it as long as I didn't mind that someone had yacked in it like hours earlier in the day, and it had dried (ew by the way) , so I dialed the only number I actually know off by heart - my old one - and realised that - HEY! that's not going to work, and then I remembered my new one so I called that, and there was no answer, then my voicemail picked up. Because the dude didn't appear to be creepy, I excalimed 'I'm going to kill my brother!' and explained that he had my phone, and all my friends were far away, and blah-blah-blah - so in summary, I told some random on the side of the road that I was all by myself and didn't have my phone, because i am oh-so-smart.
He made his phone call, that went something along the lines of 'can you pick me up? im on the corner of this street and that street, and I have nothing - no keys, no wallet, no shoes, no car, no nothing - they took it all, and i have to go to court, maybe even jail.' after he hung up, and they must have agreed to pick him up. Then, he told me he'd had the worst night ever. And me, in all my total and utter ignorance and living-in-a-bubbleness said, 'yeah, it sounds like your night was worse than mine!', because in my head of innocence, i assumed he must have gotten done for DUI or something like that - young guy + indy = it happens... but ONO... it turns out, he was arrested because apparently 'my dad thinks i tried to kill my mum' - yeah standup guy... I was possibly speechless for the first time in my life, right from when he explained getting arrested, all the way to showing me his PAPERWORK. AWESOME, I just told an attempted murderer I'm all on my lonesome in the big bad gold coast...
All I managed to get out was 'well, i hope your night gets better' before proceeding to FREAK OUT because the payphone ate the last of my change, when my phone's voicemail picked up when i tried it again, and I now had no way of calling ANYONE that I had the mobile number of, which incidentally includes - Neil, My Mum, My Dad, Me... and almost everyone I work with, and hell of a lot of good any of those people could have done at that point in time... Lets just say, THANK GOD for 1800-REVERSE. My mum was obviously less than impressed that I rang her at 12:30 am to get her to call my mobile. The dude walked away, and my mum picked up, and after I gave a VERY detailed description of my location and ensured the dude was a way far distance away, I piss-bolted back to my car, locked the doors, and...
... Answered my phone, which was sitting under my handbreak...
SERIOUSLY - Could only happen to me... (on a plus, being not dead is probably good) 10月13日 OverheardNew to my favourite things that have ever happened...
The scene: Movies - Candybar
The following conversation ensues:
F: (Handing me a GIANT movie-sized coke and popcorn) "Hold this while i get some lollies"
L: (Impatiently standing at the counter waiting, with zillions of people around me) "Hurry Up!"
F: (Filling a bag with scoopfuls of sugary coated lollies) "Hang on!"
L: (Seeing the bulging bag of lollies) "Holy crap - i think you've got enough, if you get any more i think you're going to develop diabeties"
Random Guy behind me in Line: Bursts out laughing
L: (to RGBMIL) "You can go first if you want, this will probably be a while..."
RGBMIL: "That's ok, im waiting too..."
F: (Still packing more into the bag) "I just want some gummi-bears then that's it..."
L: "Seriously dude - type two diabeties"
RGBMIL: (laughs some more) "That's a bit harsh..."
L: "Have you seen how much stuff he has? - This isn't mine"
RGBMIL: (spotting bulging bag of lollies, when paired with gigantic popcorn and massive frozen sugar water drink - bursts into fits of laughter)
F: "Okay, I'm ready"
L: "You are going to have a seisure from eating all that sugar"
RGBMIL: "It's alright, i think the salt will balance out the sugar"
We then pay $19.99/kg for approximately 700grms of lollies, and go to see (no - not 'the devil wears prada, for what would be the THIRD time in TWO WEEKS), but John Tucker must die... which incidentally, isn't about a group of girls trying to actually KILL their ex-boyfriend, which sounded like an AWESOME movie, but a bunch of girls getting together to embarass their ex-boyfriend... 'john tucker must cry' would have been a better title... but it was funny all the same (plus the guy from desperate housewives is in it, and he is adorable so i will very much not complain about a movie where he is frequently shirtless... except when his character wears womens underwear... still, he seems to be able to pull it off...)
10月9日 I never said I was a genius... and sh!tThings that I pretend to know about for work that I don't actually know anything
about, even though I can usually pretend I know what it means...
Unistrut
Facia
Flooded Suction
Simultaneous Filtration
Things I say I picked up from other people, that I really need to get over quick smart!
'Reppin It'
'Innit'
'n-sh!t'
'n-watnot'
'peow-pow'
'huthutututhutut'
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